I am officially a Tennessee resident. I finally had to go get my TN license and register my car. That felt a bit weird to hand over things that have been a huge part of my life. I have to be honest; I did not want to give up my North Carolina license. I really liked my license photo! 😉 I also felt that surrendering my NC license meant giving up a huge part of who I am. I know that sounds weird, but it’s true. A part of my identity has been wrapped up in being a “Carolina” girl.
Moving is hard.
I left behind family, friends, and a community I dearly love. I miss my people and I am pretty sure they miss me. But I am in the right place at this time. I have a great job, I am making new friends, and am learning to navigate and love my new city. I have time to explore on the weekends when I am not working or running errands.
As I explore a new city and learn to understand the culture here, I am reminded that life doesn’t always go the way I believed it would go. That is okay. It isn’t easy to try new things, move to a new city/state away from family, learn a new way of life, or find a new community of friends. It is hard. I will always be the first to say it is hard, but it is worth it. (Remember: Hard does not equal bad; it just equals hard.)
I know many others have done this before and thrived in new places. I know I will thrive here. It just takes time. As I reflect about my move and about the dreams I’ve had, I wrote the words below in my journal:
I’ve had a little bit more time to write and think about the dreams I have always had for my life. Dreams from childhood of where I thought I would be at this stage of my life have all been shattered. I look at the pieces of those dreams I once dreamt long ago and wonder why they didn’t come to pass. Did I not try hard enough? Did I miss an opportunity? Was I being realistic with those dreams?
When I look at the pieces of the dreams that I once dreamt long ago, I still feel like a little girl. Waiting, hoping, and still dreaming of what can come. I like to believe that the shattered pieces of those dreams will be woven together into a more beautiful story than I ever imagined.
Have you ever felt like that? Do you still dream and hope that those dreams will come true?